humour

All posts tagged humour

Ode to Instagram

Published February 7, 2014 by reginaginaxoxo

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The day starts with the beep of an alarm

Snooze the alarm and switch to Instagram.

So what was the post you last checked?

Scroll down till you find the red hearted.

It has been six hours since

And too many photos to examine.

So Shelly bought a red shoe

‘’Lets heart it cause it’s new’’.

OMG! Amy got the latest iphone

It’s true because the box is shown.

Tia bought some exquisite Chanel

Perhaps that’s what the hastags tell.

So many posts to see….

Oh it’s time for my morning selfie.

Nvm, yet

Still in bed….

I’ll just post my morning coffee

And later my #ootd.

 

#quoteoftheday what a start!

It nearly, nearly, nearly touched my heart.

Today is THURSDAY….. you know what that means

You’re under attack

with Thursdays throwback.

Just counteract

And post your own throwback!

One follow request…

I am totally on top of Everest.

Two unfollows!

Damn you bitches! Karma knows to deal my sorrows!

Home is where the new posts come

I’ll again like some.

He’s somewhat a photographer and this post is his art

The trees look beautiful….here (double tap) just take my heart.

‘Likes’ now is the new game of luck

Especially if you aren’t holding your starbucks.

All that glitters are surely gold

Thank the edits the secret lies untold.

Caleb and his everyday celebrity crush

Manages to post despite all his rush

                                                A picture says a thousand words

What need of hashtags? That’s so absurd.

Instagram defy it all

The very reason why you are installed.

My profile is described as me

Cool or uncool ‘’followers’’ mark the decree.

We say we don’t want be judged but we do it everyday.

Unintentionally or intentionally we don’t want to fade into gray.

Trying hard to fit in is now our motto

Along with words like swag and Y.O.L.O!

Not our fault though

Even saints had follows.

Imagine if Jesus had Instagram!

No blasphemy intended but visualize the swarm!

It’s all what we live and do

Rely on other’s view too.

Insta’gram’! In pictures you weigh our lives

And on it, I guess, we thrive.

‘’Simple living high thinking’’- said the sage

(LOL) but everyone wants to make it to the popular page!

Think high and live high

If not… you’re assumed dry.

Tomorrow is another brand new day

Monday or Friday there’s post for all days.

Post anything and keep calm

Ready and steady be the ”infinite I am”

because now YOU are instagram!

What’s so special about Darjeeling Girls???

Published January 23, 2014 by reginaginaxoxo

I am dying of boredom and despite of having tons of business to mind about esp. my upcoming exams I choose to start doing something that I have never attempted before. Actually I have but very few of you know that I am/ was a freelance writer and I love writing but I am hardly passionate about (anything). My honesty won’t be the best policy it seems. Getting to the point, today is one of those days where you hardly care about anything and you just want to twist and turn and sought your way out of the life that hardly seems moving. I’ve been irregularly sharing my personal poems and thanks to around 20 followers who read it. Well, today I decided to actually write something non-poetic. I KNOW I KNOW! I’ve been writing about Darjeeling like gazillion times and if it was legit for you, my readers ,to shoot me every time I mention ‘Darjeeling’  I’d be a living crocs by now or perhaps dead. But the place is such, my hometown is such that it has bewitched me and I am nothing less than fascinated, so here again I choose to write about Darjeeling….wait! Don’t quit reading! I am here to write about Darjeeling ‘Girls’ get your interest stimulated.

It is so easy to identify a girl from Darjeeling even if you’re in a crowded market place five or five hundred thousand miles away from hometown and you’ll have no clue she is Indian. Hold your breath I am in no mood to sing praises because only donkeys do that neither am I going to mock because only bitches do that, I’ll simply state the truth with a little bit of exaggeration because I can do thatJ.

  • Darjeeling girls complain about ‘’tan’’ but when a third pair of eyes see them they’re remarked to have a wonderful (mostly) fair skin.

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  • They’ve heard it once, they’ve heard it twice. How the hell can cheeks look like apples?

When you hear that people are complimenting your natural blush…. I hope and not the round or heart shaped face structure. :p .

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  • And there are those times when that natural blush turns into a catastrophic situation in an extremely hot climate….siliguri for example and every single pair of eyes simply ogling at you
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And you’re like what are they THINKING?

  • When travelling beyond the realms of familiarity people start addressing you as Chinese, Japanese and everything non- Indian but pro- Asian ( okay that came out wrong, but you get it right?). Tired of explaining and tired of hearing the traumatic response …. You just play along!

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  • People suddenly get so curious about you! I mean about your hair. ‘’So what shampoo do you use?’’ “Your straightened hair is fabulous!’’ “How did you curl your hair like that?’’. Oh I use kalo saboon and everything in my hair is au naturale… even if it is not.. So what? The secret of the hills are not meant to be shared.

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  • The ones who are above 5ft 3 inches are considered tall. Not just tall in D-town they are considered lucky and every tall girl has her air hostess or modeling dream achieved. Rest of us…..well sigh. I was reading Paradise Lost book one and I wondered if the dwarfs of the Himalayas was referred to us  :/ oh nvm didn’t mean to depress you. If you are above 5 ft you’re okay and if not… the secret why Darjeeling girls wear heels –revealed.

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  •  You go on a first date :- climax is…..

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  • Nevermind any of the above things mentioned. Don’t you think Darjeeling people in general  are ferociously talented? There is nothing called mediocre here. You can dance so captivatingly or even sing putting nightingale to shame (told you I would exaggerate)  and be a metal head rocking the Chowrasta festival or leisurely serenading on your guitar ? Often being the subject of envy of others. No offence but  I know you agree.

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  • So I drifted a bit from my topic…. Where we we? Ahh yes. Why are Darjeeling girls special?  They say three W’s of Darjeeling aren’t to be trusted ‘’WEATHER,WINE and WOMEN’’  I guess a loser said that because the ‘weather’ of D- town though unpredictable is enigmatic and phenomenal because everything that is predictable is boring. ‘Wine’ well about that I do not fairly know much because we drink wine that is imported along with the rest of the world so I don’t know why Darjeeling’s wine in particular is not to be trusted? As long as it is not ‘Raksee’ they were referring to, my point seems valid enough. And ‘Women’… now what do I need to fathom or justify as I know a loser made that up? The letter ‘D’ itself define a woman of Darjeeling – Desirable yet Dignified.

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  • Though referred to as a small town girl, do not mess with her, do not underestimate her and do not provoke her. Reasons?

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  • Sometimes a misfit but definitely not a loner. Darjeeling girls are cheerful, pretty and nice though I cannot say that for some psychopaths , like every case here too lies an exception. Hey! I was just kidding. Daughters of the queen irrespective of all social evils that envelops our country are to be respected no matter how different or unlike we look. We are Indians nevertheless and have pledged the same National pledge calling ourselves as an ‘INDIAN’ . Darjeeling girls and people in general are special and feel special no matter what the circumstances are because we are one of the reason  why India is known as a ‘Diverse and multi-cultural’ nation.

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And you make all the difference. 🙂

So it took me two complete hours to write this and I hope I made you smile and made you feel special. This is a locally based article(as if you couldn’t figure -_- ) so let me know if you liked it or hated it and give me your opinion if I should do these non-poetical  stuffs more often and I believe I missed a lot of points so do share your idea below. Thanks. Love you if you read this far Xo
I know the title is sexist…..but that is how i got you to read all of this 😀
– Regina Gurung